Rewired: Small Changes for Powerful Results

A recap of our September PoShe event with Jen Perry

We spend so much energy chasing big goals and dramatic overhauls that we forget the truth Jen Perry came to remind us. The women who change their lives are not the ones who white-knuckle a massive transformation overnight. They are the ones who get just one percent better, one small and almost invisible decision at a time.

Grounded in James Clear's Atomic Habits and delivered with Jen's signature warmth and honesty, the evening was part coaching session and part permission slip. She gave us real tools to build the habits we want and to release the ones we don't, and she wrapped all of it in the reminder so many of us needed to hear, which is to give ourselves a little grace along the way.

For those of you who were there, consider this your set of notes to reflect back on. For those who couldn't make it, here is what you missed, and why we hope you'll catch Jen the next time she's in the room with us.

Systems over goals, and identity over everything

Goals are fine, but they are only a momentary change. You hit the number, you get the certificate, and then you are right back to the systems that got you there. You do not rise to the level of your goals, you fall to the level of your systems.

Underneath those systems sits something even more important, and that is what you believe about yourself. The quiet things we repeat, like "I'm awful with math" or "I'm just so awkward," are beliefs we cast a vote for every single day. Jen's challenge to us was to change the belief first. Decide you are someone who is capable and delegates. Decide you eat healthy. Decide that no is a complete sentence. Then let your actions follow the woman you've already decided to be.

Every decision you make is a vote for who you are.

She was clear that this is not about perfection. Miss a morning workout and you have not stopped being an early riser. Every time you show up, even imperfectly, you cast another vote. The votes are what add up.

Four simple ways to build a new habit

This was the practical heart of the night, and it's the part people will want to come back and reread. Jen walked us through four approachable ways to make a good habit easier to start and easier to keep.

Habit stacking. Take something you already do without thinking and attach the new habit to it. Jen drinks her full glass of water when she takes her nightly vitamins, because the two are now linked. Say your affirmation right after you brush your teeth. Do a quick stretch the moment you take your walking shoes off. You are borrowing the momentum of a habit that already works.

Cues from time and place. Our environment and our clock are powerful triggers. Walk into the kitchen and grab a vegetable instead of a brownie. Jen is a self-described night owl who has worked out at 8:00 p.m. on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for years, and now the clock striking eight is all the cue she needs. She'll pause a show mid-episode and go, simply because that is what happens at eight.

Temptation bundling. Pair something you have to do with something you want to do. Answer emails while you get a pedicure. Save your favorite can't-look-away show for the treadmill and nowhere else, so the workout and the reward become one.

The two-minute rule. This one is Jen's favorite, and it may be the most freeing thing she said all night. We fail because we take too big a bite. Instead of meal prepping for the entire week at 11:00 at night, just find one recipe. Instead of decluttering the whole house, empty one drawer and walk away. The goal isn't to finish, it's to start, because starting creates the good feeling that keeps you going.

Jen's own story made it stick. When she first started at the gym, she wasn't lifting anything impressive and nobody noticed her at all. But she was showing up, putting her shoes on, and walking in the door, and that was the whole habit. Years later she happily spends two hours there and loves it. The habit was never the perfect workout. It was the arrival.

Keeping your habits on track

Building a habit is one thing. Protecting it when life gets messy is another. A few honest tools for the long haul:

Find an accountability partner, or simply tell someone what you're working on, because we care what people think and that check-in keeps us honest. Track what you're actually doing, since most of us have a wonderfully distorted view of our own consistency, and make sure you're tracking the right thing, the trips to the gym and the workouts logged rather than only the number on the scale.

And then the line that got the biggest nod of recognition in the room. Never miss twice. Missing once is a moment. Missing twice is the start of a new, unwanted habit. So when you slip, Jen said, the very first move is to reclaim your identity. Remind yourself who you are.

I am a successful businesswoman. I am a speaker. I am someone who takes care of herself.

Look at the stumble for exactly what it is, and redirect.

Don't try to change everything. Just choose one.

Pick one identity shift and decide who you're becoming. Stack one new habit onto something you already do. Bundle one thing you want with one thing you need. Shrink one goal down to a two minute start. And remember that the small stuff is never silly, because those tiny choices are the trajectory. A plane pointed just slightly off course misses its destination entirely, and in the very same way, a few one percent shifts will quietly carry you somewhere new.

Thank you to Jen Perry for an evening that was equal parts practical and permission-giving, and thank you to every woman who showed up, shared, and cheered each other on. This is exactly the kind of night this community was built for.

Jen Perry is the founder of Jen Perry Leadership, where her work centers on coaching leaders and elevating organizations. She brings a practical, human approach to growth and change, grounding big ideas like the ones in James Clear's Atomic Habits in the real, messy lives of the women and leaders she works with.

Based on presentation by Jen Perry | Founder of Jen Perry Leadership | PoShe Contributor
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📩 Connect with Jen Perry at: jenhearn3@gmail.com
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